Superman Cereal

I'm pretty excited for Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice, but when I saw some ads for the two new cereal tie-ins, I said to myself, there's no fucking way I'm buying those.  That's just stupid.

Then the other day I was grocery shopping with the family and saw them on the shelf.  And I actually saw the last box of each kind the store had.  Superman's is a Caramel Crunchy Thing that apparently looks like puppy kibble and then Batman's is chocolate and strawberry together.

How either of these are supposed to represent the characters I'll never know.

Batman's cereal at least looks like something you'd expect from Batman - small black bats.  Superman's though, tries to look like the diamond shape for the "S" emblem.  And that's all it does is try.  Maybe they were "hoping" that we'd just go along with it.  See what I did there?  Hope?  Superman's "S"?  Hope?  Get it?  Get it?

You don't get it.

So anyway, I saw these boxes of cereal before my kids did and pretty much shit my pants with excitement.  I couldn't explain it in the moment, but eventually realized that these cereals made me feel like a kid again.  You see, when I was a kid, I had Superman French Fries and Superman Peanut Butter.  That shit was real.  And tasty.  You can YouTube some commercials for Superman Peanut Butter if you don't believe me.  And it's not like some of the other movie tie-ins you see these days - Star Wars, Frozen, Avengers characters on Honey Comb, Shreddies, and Frosted Flakes.

Shake yo' S, watch yo-self, shake yo' S, Save the Daily Planet

Fuck no, these are Superman and Batman's own cereal.  

It's not just a box of Sugar Crisp with a picture of Superman on it.  This is a cereal inspired (somehow, though I still don't really get it) by The Man of Goddam Steel.  That's way more awesome, and makes me far more interested in trying it.

(Side fun fact - in the mid-90s when I was at the height of my nerdy collecting, I had a box of Corn Flakes with Val Kilmer's Batman on the box.  I saved that box of cereal for about four or five years because I thought it might be worth money some day.  Then when I was living on my own for the first time and hungry because I spent all my food money on booze, I opened up that old-ass box of cereal and ate it.  Didn't shit right for a few days after.)

"Who's better, Batman or Superman?"... "Elsa and Anna."

Back to the adventure!

So I grabbed both boxes to let my daughter Ryleigh pick which cereal we should get.  I'm a bigger Superman fan at heart, so I thought it would be fair to let her pick.  I wasn't going to buy both, because that doesn't set a very good parenting example.  Don't get me wrong though, if there was another dad eyeing them up behind me, ready to pounce on whichever one I didn't choose, then I would have bought them both.  Fuck him, whoever he may be in my imagination of events that didn't happen, but could have.

Ryan: "Okay Ryleigh, should we get the Chocolate Strawberry Batman, or the Caramel Crunch Superman cereal?"
Ryleigh: "Hmmmmmmmmm......."
Ryan: "Batman or Superman?"
Ryleigh: "Hmmmmmm...... ummmmmm......"
The Lovely Wife: "...what do either of those flavors have to do with the characters..."
Ryleigh: "Hmmmmmmmm....."
Ryan: "Okay, we're getting Superman.  You took too long to decide."
Ryleigh: "But!...."

And that people, is how you parent.

Oh no!  It's Kryptonite!

So we tried the cereal this morning.  I ate it dry, and Ryleigh had it with milk.  She must have really liked it, because she downed it all in half the time it normally takes her to eat.  She eats about as fast as... I dunno, I've got no comparison here.  She eats very slowly.

I really liked it too.  Tasted good.

The boxes are neat, with textured logos and eye-popping visuals.  If you're like me and you read too much into everything you see, you might notice that the Caramel Crunchy bits are popping right out of Superman's crotch area.  Fucking weirdo aliens.

I'd recommend trying it if you see it, if only because it's something you've never had before.  And you can hum the Superman music while eating it.  It really did bring me back to the days of Superman French Fries and Peanut Butter.  I'm not going to say this cereal is "super" because that would be... awww fuck it, this cereal is super.

Thanks for reading!
- ryan