Top 11 After Sex Comments

Let's get one thing straight: I'm not suggesting you say ANY of these phrases after sex. I just think it would be hella fun to try it. And on with the list!

11. Now that's what I call a vagina! High five!

10. Don't worry baby. You just lay there... I'll go get the shop-vac and clean this up.

9. Hmm... I dunno honey. It still felt the same even though I was thinking of Taylor Swift.

8. That was the slam-banginest, vadge-pumpingest, elbow-deepest, knob-polishingest, buttered-toastingest, root-tootin' screw-ride since Harry met Sally!

7. Alright, that'll be twenty bucks, baby.

6. I think I'm going to start investing in IBM again. I dunno, just seems like the right time.

5. You go ahead. I'm gonna lay here for a bit and reflect upon what we just did and try to rank it in some sort of Top 11 list... don't worry, I'm sure you'll land in the top three or four...

4. Again tomorrow? Same Bat-time! Same Bat-Channel!

3. Well what did you expect it to taste like? Pomegranate? Chicken Cordon Bleu? I friggin' ate Spaghetti-O's today!

2. You're so beautiful. You're smart, sexy, and you give 110% when you make sweet love to me. Your body is like an ocean being discovered for the first time. When you moan so passionately, I can see new constellations forming. When you climaxed, my heart skipped a beat. And that little half-smile you made... wow. The look in your eyes right now is just so satisfying. What time did you say your husband would be home?

1. I think your poster of Justin Bieber is staring at me.

Thanks for reading!
- ryan