Top 11 Robots

Let's face it, someday we'll all be replaced by robots.  So why not strive to be like a great robot of history? Historically speaking, there have been many robots over the years that have influenced the ages.  They were all wonderful.

11. BB-8
Who doesn't love balls?  BB-8 is two of them! That's twice the robotic balls rolling around, cracking jokes and hiding maps to old folks with robotic hands. Balls!

10. Dot Matrix
Let's face it, everyone needs a virgin alarm. Just in case.

09. Fox's NHL Robots from the early 90s
We may have hated them at the time, but those bots were pioneers of good ol' Californian ice hockey. Without them the Kings or Mighty Ducks may never have won a Stanley Cup.

08. Wall-E
If you don't find yourself wanting to hug this little guy, then you might already be a robot devoid of a soul. I bet you don't like celery with cheese wiz either.

07. Conky
Without him we would never know what today's secret word is. 'Nuff said.

06. Metalhead
Be realistic - of all the Ninja Turtles, Metalhead was the one with the best shot at April O'Neil. I mean, he's no Casey Jones, but who is?

"Your mother was a snowblower!"

05. Astro Boy
Soaring high in the skies, he may be small but only in size. He is brave and true and wise.

04. The Terminator
Go with him if you want to live.

03. Paulie's Robot Girlfriend
I'm actually surprised that Paulie's Robot Girlfriend isn't #1. And I write these lists. This robot is special because of how we learn more about love from it than even Adrian herself. I'd like to think that if Rocky didn't beat the Russian in IV, that maybe Paulie's Robot Girlfriend would have finished the job. Happy birthday Paulie.

02. Jazz
With so many Autobots and Decepticons to choose from, it was tough to pick just one robot in disguise. So I chose Jazz. He was pretty much that cool friend, who had all the cool records and knew which girls would let you feel them up. You know, under the shirt and over the bra. Jazz is awesome.

01. Johnny Five
He's alive and he's pals with Steve Gutteburg. All other robots would clearly be jealous of him.

Thanks for reading!
-ryan

"She loves me."

The Best of 2015!

Once again it's time to look back on what happened in a calendar year.  I do this every year, and it's important to remember that this is all my opinion.  My best isn't necessarily your best, or your mama's best, or your drug dealer's best. 

Entertainment wise, 2015 was a pretty decent year.  Here's what I liked best about it.

The Best Movies of 2015
1. Creed
Let's get one thing straight - I was fully ready to make The Force Awakens the #1 movie of the year from the time I saw the first trailer.  Then something happened.  A new Rocky movie came out.  While a new Star Wars flick is the one that made me most excited, it was Creed that had me leaving the theater fully blown away.  Props to Trainwreck for being hysterical and giving John Cena something interesting to do (I don't mean being naked).  And Cinderella was a surprising amount of fun too.
2. The Force Awakens
3. Terminator: Genysis
4. Trainwreck
5. Cinderella

The Best Music of 2015
1. Prince: Hit N' Run Phase One
I didn't buy a whole lot of new music this year, but what I did drop money on I really liked.  Prince put out two new albums this year, with the first one being incredible and the second being just okay.  Buckcherry is no stranger to this yearly list either.  Hollywood Vampires is a classic rocking album that everyone should take a listen to (Alice Cooper + Joe Perry + Johnny Depp = awesome).  A new Bon Jovi record came out with very little attention.  It's good, but is definitely missing Ritchie Sambora.
2. Buckcherry: Rock N' Roll
3. Hollywood Vampires
4. Bon Jovi : Burning Bridges
5. Steven Tyler - Love Is Your Name

The Best TV of 2015
1. The Muppets
This fall was also the most excited I've been for new TV in a long time.  The Muppets is just perfect, Supergirl keeps getting better, and Ash VS Evil Dead reminds us what we loved about Sam Raimi's flicks in the first place.  There's actually more TV I've wanted to catch up on but haven't had the time to, because there's just so much good on right now.  Hell, I could even add in some of the shows my kids watch because those are darn good too.
2. Supergirl
3. Ash Vs Evil Dead
4. Flash
5. WWE Raw

The Best Babes of 2015
1. Melissa Benoist (Supergirl)
I keep using the word "Adorkable" for this new Supergirl.  I forget where I stole the phrase from but I'm going to keep using it.  Seriously, watch that show.  You'll fall in love with her.  Paige continues to be the main reason I tune in to WWE Raw on Monday nights.  And Dillion Harper is... well, I'm sure you can figure that out.  If not, there's such a thing as Google.  Taylor Swift continues to leave messages on my phone, and Daisy Ridley has become everyone's new favorite Jedi. 
2. Paige (WWE Diva)
3. Dillion Harper (Moms Bang Teens #11)
4. Taylor Swift
5. Daisy Ridley (The Force Awakens)

So that's what I thought of 2015.
What did you like best?

- ryan

Top 11 Romantic Movies

Yes, Valentine's Day is almost here.  It's a day in which many of us take those we love out to dinner and a movie.  The big talk is all about Fifty Shades of Grey being this V-Day's must-see controversial movie.  I dunno, I'd probably watch it on blu-ray when it comes out.  Besides, my lovely wife is going with one of her girlfriends to see it on Friday night.  Any way, if you don't have tickets for it or you don't want to watch it, here are 11 other VERY romantic movies for a nice, "stay in and order pizza and a movie" kind of Valentine's Day.  There's something on this list for everyone. 

11. Edward Scissorhands
10. Grumpier Old Men
9. Chasing Amy
8. The Master of Disguise
7. Saved By The Bell: Wedding In Las Vegas
6. Don't Tell My Wife I Assfucked The Babysitter Vol. 15
5. Cocktail
4. How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days
3. The Wedding Singer
2. Somewhere In Time
1. Rocky 

Top 11 80's Action Heroes

Everyone loves a good action flick.  And the best action movies came straight outta the 80s.  If you disagree then you're wrong.  So I've compiled a list of the best 80's Action Heroes.

But wait, there's certain criteria and rules to follow here.
Rule A: The character must be from an 80's movie.
Rule B: The character must ONLY be in an 80's movie, thus eliminating the possibility of such favorites as Indiana Jones, The Terminator, Rocky, Rambo, Batman, Martin Riggs, and Superman.  You see, they all had sequels in the 90s or the series started in the 70s.

11. Lt. Marion Cobretti (Cobra)
10. Dean Youngblood (Youngblood)
9. Bruce (They Call Me Bruce?)
8. Rip (No Holds Barred)
7. Daniel Larusso (The Karate Kid I-III)
6. Stargrove (Never Too Young To Die)
5. Jack (Legend)
4. Dalton (Road House)
3. Mad Martigan (Willow)
2. John Matrix (Commando)
1. Action Jackson (Action Jackson)

So I hope you've enjoyed this quick Top 11.  I'll consider doing a 90's version, but those 90's action flicks just don't have the same pizazz as the eighties ones.
- ryan of the ryan fan club.

Top 11 Movies That Are Really Christmas Movies

It's time to take a look back at eleven movies we love that we may not have realized were actually Christmas movies all along.  Just because there ain't no flying reindeer, contracts to make you Santa Claus (no E), or comedians dressed up as elves doesn't mean these aren't great Holiday classics in their own right. 

11. I Am Legend (2007)
Will Smith is alone with his dog in a world that was destroyed by disease... or something.  It was so long ago that I watched this movie.   Anyway, the genocide took place on Christmas Day so if you really don't like Christmas then this is the best place to start.
10. Trading Places (1983)
The classic comedy that features Eddie Murphy getting rich on Dan Aykroyd's money during the holiday season.  At the end of the day, who hasn't spent a little bit of Aykroyd's money at some point in their lives?
9. Mean Girls (2004)
Alright, this one takes place over an entire school year, but who could forget that little holiday assembly number featuring Lindsay Lohan and Rachel McAdams in slutty Santa costumes?  Add in the fact that they probably just turned 18 at that point, and you've got a film worthy of roasting your chestnuts over.

They don't look so mean...

8. The Ref (1994)
Dennis Leary robs your house and ends up smelling like cat piss for 90+ minutes.  It's a decent comedy, and I'm not just saying that because Leary is a huge Bruins fan too. 
7. Just Friends (2005)
What happens when the fat kid comes home and turns out to be rich, attractive, and really annoying?  If you're a chick, it probably doesn't matter much so long as he looks like Ryan Reynolds.  That guy could make sweet love to all the women in a room before getting all the way in the door.
6. Trapped In Paradise (1994)
Nicolas Cage normally doesn't make good movies, but thanks to Jon Lovitz and Dana Carvey, he's got a funny hit on his hands.  This is the tale of three bank robbers on Christmas Eve who end up breaking back into the bank to put the money back when Nicolas Cage has a change of heart.

Everybody can change!

5. Lethal Weapon (1987)
Celebrate the birth of Christ with Mel Gibson 15 years before that "Passion" film!  And also, I just recently learned that Danny Glover's "Too Old For This Shit" house is the same house that the annoying neighbors in National Lampoons' Christmas Vacation live in.  Well, sonofabitch!
4. Rocky IV (1985)
The greatest fight in history, Rocky Balboa versus Ivan Drago, brings east and west together.  If Rocky can change, and YOU can change, then everybody can change... and it all goes down in Russia on Christmas Day!
3. Batman Returns (1992)
Leave it to Tim Burton to associate Christmas with people dressed up as bats, cats, and penguins.  And Christopher Walken.  That guy just screams Christmastime. 
2. Die Hard (1988)
Truth be told: I never liked Bruce Willis until I saw The Whole Nine Yards and heard his mayonnaise rant.  When I saw Die Hard, and Willis saved the day in his bare feet, I could finally appreciate him as an action hero.  Yippi-ki-yay, mother fucker.
1. Gremlins (1984)
Don't put them in the light... don't get them wet... and don't fucking feed them after midnight!  From the opening sequence with my very favorite Christmas song of all time ("Christmas [Baby, Please Come Home]" by Darlene Love) to the multi-Gremlin massacre around the Christmas Tree... this is just a pure gem.

- ryan of the ryan fan club

awwwww... his buddies are gonna tear up the city.

5 Movies That Are Under-Appreciated

Today we're looking at five movies that are generally under-appreciated for different reasons.  Usually, you'll find people turning their nose up at these movies or just completely ignoring them without just cause.  So let's begin...

Home team!

1. Rocky V (1990)
The original Rocky flick won the Oscar for best picture in 1976.  Yes, it really did.  But by 1990, moviegoers  were pretty much done with Stallone's #1 character.  And that's too bad, because they missed out on a darn good movie.  You see, the previous Rocky sequels, while all wonderful in their own right, started following a formula in which Stallone has to square off against some bad-ass boxer for the championship.  So when Rocky V came along, everyone was in the mindset of "been there, done that" already.  What we ended up with was a great story of an athlete who is forced into retirement for his health, but still longs to be in the ring.  He's lost his wealth, and is forced to live in the poorest area of Philadelphia.  So he takes on a protege that just doesn't have the same heart and passion that he does.  This new kid is only interested in the fame and fortune.  Eventually, the teacher becomes the student and has to fight for his own pride and self-respect.  Really, if the actors were different and the characters had different names, you'd think it was the feel-good movie of the year.

Batman Returns Again

2. Batman Forever (1995)
The third Bat-flick isn't really as bad as it gets credit for.  Often times, because of it's visual style, the movie gets lumped in with that awful Batman & Robin sequel.  "Forever" is the only installment of this series that puts any focus on the psyche of Batman (which is what gets Nolan's movies so much credit) and the DVD has deleted footage of Bruce Wayne reading his father's diary that really adds layers to what makes this man don a cape and cowl.  Why it wasn't included in the film, I'll never know.  Perhaps it was too dark for the target audience.  The movie itself is up and down.  At times the story is very genuine, and then in the last twenty minutes they're clearly trying to sell us new toys.  In all fairness, the action sequences are really quite good, so most of those toys would be fun to play with.  The music is dreadful though.  They should have stuck with Danny Elfman's theme. Oh well.  I think when watching any movie of the super-hero genre, we have to remember that these movies are primarily made for young boys so we should try to let them re-capture our imagination.  The movies, not the young boys.

Crunchies & Munchies

3. The Black Cauldron (1985)
I bet you never thought a Disney cartoon would pretty much bankrupt their animation department.
Well, that's pretty much what happened.  Rumors have it that the great profits from The Little Mermaid helped recoup all the damage that was caused by the Black Cauldron.  This movie wasn't just under-appreciated by audiences, it was pretty much abandoned by Disney until 1998 when it was released on VHS.  The film certainly does not fit in with any other Disney animated feature.  It's dark, it has no ridiculous sing-along songs, and it's more aimed at boys instead of young girls who want to someday be a princess too.  Personally, I love the movie and wish Disney would take another stab at making animated features like this.  More adults are watching animation than ever before, and really, nobody does animation better than Disney, so there's absolutely an unexplored market for them to jump into.

...Doctor Acula!

4. Ed Wood (1994)
People love Johnny Depp.  People also love Tim Burton.  And people really love when Johnny Depp is in a Tim Burton movie.  So you'd think that Ed Wood would be in everyone's top ten.  But nope, it seems like nobody's ever heard of this perfect little movie.  Maybe it's because the flick is in black and white.  This is the story of the worst movie director of all-time, Edward D. Wood Jr., and how he makes some of the worst movies ever made.  It's a shame that less and less people have seen this movie (Martin Landeau won an Oscar for his performance in it) but they have no problem shelling out their hard-earned money for a really shitty fourth installment of Captain Jack Sparrow.  Johnny Depp has never been as quirky and funny as he is in Ed Wood, and Tim Burton gets the chance to pay homage to one of his inspirations.

Greatest movie ever.

5. Anything with Hulk Hogan in it
Seriously.  How did Hulk Hogan not win the Best Actor Oscar for his portrayal of Rip, the WWF Heavyweight Champion, in 1989's "No Holds Barred"?  There's NOBODY that could play that role better than the Hulkster.  He was BORN to play that part.
And then there's "Mr. Nanny", a flick that shows Hogan's range as an actor, as he must save some brats from David Johanson (lead singer of the New York Dolls).  And wear a tutu while sipping tea.
Hulk Hogan is quite possibly the greatest actor of all-time.  I mean, he somehow managed to perform the exact same wrestling match for twenty-five years and keep people watching it.

So there you have it.  The weekend is here.  Go rent or download these movies if you've never seen them.  And if you have, give them another chance.